Thursday, December 9, 2010

A PC Christmas

I could not resist this goodie on a Politically Correct Christmas. This should thrill the leftist progressives who insist on Christmas(opps can't say that) Winter Holiday being politically correct.

I discovered this at and must give credit where credit is due.

The politically correct Christmas


 On the 12th day of the Eurocentrically imposed midwinter festival, my Significant Other in a consenting adult, monogamous relationship gave to me:

Christmas Santa
TWELVE males reclaiming their inner warrior through ritual drumming,

ELEVEN pipers piping (plus the 18-member pit orchestra made up of members in good standing of the Musicians Equity Union as called for in their union contract even though they will not be asked to play a note),

TEN melanin deprived testosterone-poisoned scions of the patriarchal ruling class system leaping,

NINE persons engaged in rhythmic self-expression,

EIGHT economically disadvantaged female persons stealing milk-products from enslaved Bovine-Americans,

SEVEN endangered swans swimming on federally protected wetlands,

SIX enslaved Fowl-Americans producing stolen non-human animal products,

FIVE golden symbols of culturally sanctioned enforced domestic incarceration,

(NOTE: after members of the Animal Liberation Front threatened to throw red paint at my computer, the calling birds, French hens and partridge have been reintroduced to their native habitat. To avoid further Animal-American enslavement, the remaining gift package has been revised.)

FOUR hours of recorded whale songs

THREE deconstructionist poets

TWO Sierra Club calendars printed on recycled processed tree carcasses and...

ONE Spotted Owl activist chained to an old-growth pear tree.

Merry Christmas Happy Chanukah. Good Kwanzaa. Blessed Yule. Happy Holidays! (unless otherwise prohibited by law)*

*Unless, of course, you are suffering from Seasonally Affected Disorder (SAD). If this be the case, please substitute this gratuitous call for celebration with suggestion that you have a thoroughly adequate day.


Brenda null Bowers said...

They just keep getting betterer and betterer. BB

Ticker said...

Thanks BB. I'm just trying to put a little cheer in the day for folks. HO HO HO .

Anonymous said...


Tsk tsk tsk, Ticker...ya hain't allowed to say "HO HO HO" hain't PC correct!!!! ;~0


Z said...

I couldn't get past a few lines, it actually turned my stomach cuz it's so believable that people would actually THINK like this! :-)
But, it IS fun (sort of) and I thank you for posting it!
You're terrific, Ticker!

I wish you could have seen my bible study CHristmas program this morning! ALl went very well and my solor of BREATH OF HEAVEN went over great! We were able to record it and I'm hoping to get it SOMEHOW on my blog nearer CHristmas

Ticker said...

I'll be looking forward to hearing your solo Z.
I posted the PC Christmas just to show how ridiculous some folks are and at the same time to poke fun at them. I believe the original was written for the same reason .

Anonymous said...

Hilaroious! Thanks for the lift!!

Old Rose